


Sirensong

by OnceABlueMoon



Series: What the Water Gave Me [1]
Category: Free!
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Alternate Universe - Merpeople, Alternate Universe - Selkies, Angst with a Happy Ending, Cursed Haru, Fairy Tale Curses, Fairy Tale Style, M/M, Merpeople, Mythical Beings & Creatures, Romance, Selkies, Siren Rin, Sirens, Suicidal Thoughts, but not really, merfolk culture
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-02
Updated: 2017-05-02
Packaged: 2018-10-14 01:50:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,504
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10526382
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OnceABlueMoon/pseuds/OnceABlueMoon
Summary: The sea god was furious. He cursed the fisherman's children and all those of their line to lose their tails upon birth, so they were fated to long for the sea forever, but nevermore able to join it.'Haru curses his lungs with all his might but damns the true curse resting upon him more. Because deep down in the sea, there is a boy he loves but cannot follow.Haru is cursed to stay on land forever, but falls in love with  a siren anyway.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own Free!

In Iwatobi, close by the sea, there is a river. The rushing water is distinct in the entire west side of the town, so loud the church bell’s ringing isn’t audible. The riverbanks are slippery and down along the path, the cliffs rise. Continuing is impossible.

Nobody tries to climb the cliff. If you fall down, if you slip, you’ll land in the water. Before the fishermen will find your reeking corpse in their nets, they will know you have died by the screeching of the seagulls and the stench the wind brought with it. If you haven’t been ripped to shreds by the bedrock’s jagged edges, you’ll be devoured by the seven rapids the river hosts. Even the fish don’t survive there.

This is the first lesson Iwatobi’s little ones are taught: Stay away from the river (it will be your death if you don’t).

Sometimes, though, passer-by’s see people climbing the rocks in the river, as if they are following a path only they can see. They don’t think it strange. They don’t feel alarmed. If there are people on the river rocks, it can only be the Nanase’s, named for the seven rapids that make the river so dangerous.

A Nanase’s foot won’t slip off the riverbanks, nor will they fall off the stepping stones. They belong in between the rushing water, the sharp rock and the howling of the wind.

The bay at the river mouth is their sanctuary. One side is sealed off by the river and the cliff, the other by the course crashing into the sea and where the current is calmer, the coral reefs. Seabirds do not dare to deface the place, but you’ll spot crabs and treasures in the sand- shells, sea stars and if you’re lucky, a sand dollar. The breeze smells like a mixture of salt and sand, and the pebbles are smooth. Despite the force, the rushing is never louder than the waves crashing into the shore.

It is a beautiful place, but the water flows sorrowful, like a mother dying of childbirth caressing the child’s face for the last time. No one knows why.

When they hear the seagulls screaming another fell victim to the sea, the old biddies gather children around them and spin tales of sirens in front of the fireplace. “Gorgeous creatures singing their hearts out for lost men,” they croak. “They lure sailors into the sea and drown them, ripping into the corpses with the shark teeth hidden behind their pretty lips. Ruthless as the sea itself.

The children hang onto their words- Nobody knows whether that story is true either.

* * *

His grandmother tells him tales.

‘’They sang, darling,’’ she would say to him on cold nights when he left his bed behind and crawled shivering into hers, ‘’and it sounded like home. They are the voice of the sea, the pearl in the shell of the world.’’

An owl hoots outside. It’s dark, but it’s warmer than his own bed, nestled against his grandmother underneath the duvet. It smells like old people, but that’s okay. Haru has never known anything else. He vaguely remembers his mother’s rose perfume, but otherwise, his grandmother’s lavender scent means family.

He puts his cold hands in hers and shifts closer to her warmth. He watches the shadows on the wall and loses himself in the story.

_‘’Long ago, on a coast not yet named, a fisherman spent all day at sea, but as the sun began to set, he still had only a meager catch. When night fell, he rowed to shore and beached his boat._

_As he walked across the beach, he heard a sweet, lyrical tune, a song more beautiful than any he had ever heard._

_He turned towards the sound and saw. There, near the water, a dozen Selkie people were laughing and singing. The fisherman could not believe his eyes. Few ever saw the seal folk, who now and then cast aside their skins and took on human forms to play on the shore._

_The fisherman stood and stared, but when the Selkie people noticed him, they quickly dived into the sea. Slipping beneath the waves, they disappeared._

_"I must have been dreaming," said the fisherman aloud, and again he turned toward his cottage. But something nagged at him, so he turned again, and this time he noticed something sleek and shiny lying on a rock. He walked closer, and now he saw: It was a seal skin._

_"No one will believe I've seen the Selkies unless I show them this," he said, and so he picked up the skin and slung it over his shoulder._

_As he walked, he whistled. "What a pretty penny I'll earn by selling this."_

_Just as he said this, he heard footsteps behind him, and fearing a thief, he quickly turned around to look._

_There was no thief behind him. No, indeed. It was a beautiful young woman standing there, weeping so hard it nearly caused the fisherman's heart to break._

_"Beautiful lady," he said, "why do you weep?"_

_"Kind sir," she said, choking back tears, "you have my sealskin. I beg of you, give it back, for I belong to the Selkies, and cannot live under the sea without my skin."_

_The fisherman could not stop staring. You see, he had fallen in love at first sight, and because he was a young man, and terribly headstrong, he thought he must keep her with him, not thinking of her wants at all. He clutched the sealskin to his chest, pressing it to his pounding heart._

_"Dear lady," he said gently, "be my wife, for I have fallen madly in love with you, and without your sealskin, you'll have to live on land. I'll make you happy, I promise."_

_"Please sir," she cried, "my folk will be so worried. I must go home. Never could I be happy on land."_

_But the young man was stubborn. So he smiled as sweetly as he could, bowed his head and bent down on one knee. "Dear woman, my cottage is a cozy place. I'll keep you warm by the fire, I'll feed you all the fresh fish you could ever wish to eat. I promise you will live a blissful life on land as my bride."_

_The young woman was helpless without her skin. "I fear I must go home with you until you will return my skin," she said frightened, and he took her hand and led her to his home._

_For many weeks the fisherman kept the sealskin with him, for he feared his bride-to-be would steal it and slip away. But after a while, the sweet lady began to settle in the life on land, and when the fisherman thought she was content, he stuffed the skin inside a crevice in the chimney. "There my girl will never find it," he said to himself._

_They married and time passed. They led a joyful life, for though the fisherman was stubborn and selfish at times, he was also kind and generous. He truly loved his wife, and worked hard to make her happy.  
After a while, the Selkie woman grew to love her stubborn husband, and sometimes she would sing to him. Those nights he was the happiest man in the world._

_As the years passed, the couple had seven children, and the Selkie woman loved them with all her heart.  
Most of the time the family was merry, though every once in a while the children would find their mother on the beach, gazing wistfully out to sea. They would circle her and ask, "Mother, why do you look so sad?"_

_And she would shake her head and kiss their foreheads. "Never mind," she told her children, "I've only been dreaming too long."_

_One day the fisherman and the three eldest children went out in their boat to catch fish. The next three walked to the village to buy some bread and milk and the mother and her youngest son stayed home alone._

_Now the mother looked out of the window and watched the waves crashing onto the shore. Far in the distance, she noticed a band of seals playing and barking on the slick, black rocks. She sighed deeply, and her eyes filled with tears._

_Her youngest son ran to her side. "Mother, what's wrong?" he asked.  "Whenever you look out to sea, you grow so sad."_

_  
Without thinking she turned and said: "I'm sad because I was born in the sea. It's the home to which I can never return because your father hid my sealskin."_

_Now the boy, like all children, had heard tales of the Selkie folk, so right away he knew what his mother must be, and he ran to the fireplace, reached up and pulled the sealskin from its hiding place. He held it out to his mother._

_"How did you find it?" she asked, astonished at the sight of her skin._

_"One day, I was here alone with father," said the boy, "and he took this from its hiding place and stared at it. I knew it was special, and now I understand what it is."_

_The woman embraced the sealskin, and then she reached for her child and embraced him. "My darling," she whispered, "I will always love you," and then, clasping sealskin to her heart, she ran outside and down to the sea._

_She slipped into her skin and dived into the bracing water._

 ‘’And the wife swam away from her husband. And though he called out to the sea every day, desperate to get her back, she never answered.’’

Haru frowns. ‘’What happened to the children?’’

His grandmother smiles sadly, her face barely visible in the soft lamplight of the bedside table. ‘’The sea god was furious. His rage brought terrible tragedy upon the fisherman’s family.

Because, despite the fact the selfish fisherman had forced the selkie maiden to marry him, he was a family man and what hurt his family hurt him. So the sea god took his revenge in a manner so terrible that even today we can hardly bring ourselves to speak of it. He cursed the fisherman’s children and all those of their line to lose their tail-skins upon birth, fated to long for the sea forever, but never able to join it.’’

There has been a tremendous ache inside of him his entire life and the tale makes him awfully sad. But Haru can see the look in his grandmother’s eyes and knows he is not alone in this.

They still do not sleep well that night.

* * *

His gaze tends to flit around, as if glimpsing something in the corner of his eyes. He doesn’t, but Haru feels like he should. Like the creatures in his dreams belonged there, dancing in the water instead of air.

The life he lives while awake is boring in comparison.

He doesn’t mind the other children as long as they don’t bother him. He just wants to do his own thing. Wants to be free, even if he isn’t sure what being free truly means.

He’s been trapped all his life.

* * *

‘’It’s just,’’ his mother sighs, looking at the lipstick stain on the rim of her teacup, ‘’I would be less worried if he would _talk_ to people. Makoto is his only friend. He shuts everyone else out! Haru isn’t shy- he’s anything but! So why does he keep being difficult?!’’

His mother picks at her sleeves. The plaid shirt is wrinkled and her fidgeting only makes it worse. His grandmother reaches over the table and takes his mother’s hand. Her expression is tight and she licks her lips as if she is trying to soften it. It doesn’t work.

Haru knows how hard it is to be patient with the people around you.

‘’Aoi, stop worrying about Haruka. He’s fine, believe me. Chiura was no different as a child! Always puttering of somewhere, doing who knows what- though it probably involved water.’’ She frowns and lets his mother’s hand go. ‘’How is Chiura, actually?’’

His mother averts her eyes, biting her lip. ‘’He… He isn’t well, I’m afraid.’’

His grandmother shakes her head, gaze straying to the sea, lost in thought. She folds her hand under her chin. ‘’I thought so.’’

* * *

Haru doesn’t dwell on the conversation. To be honest, the only thing he paid attention to was the one friend remark. That’s not true. Haru has two friends, and though he loves Makoto, Rin makes the world shine brighter.

Rin is different. He’s another species, to begin with.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, everyone!
> 
> For those who didn’t know, Nanase (七瀬) means seven rapids. The river had seven rapids in it, so the people called it Nanase river (literally ‘’seven rapid river’’). As the cursed family was the only one who could get near the river without dying, they were eventually called by its name too, and so the ‘’Nanase’’ family name was born. I wanted to explain this just in case it wasn’t clear. 
> 
> The Selkie Bride is a real fairy tale, though I rewrote some parts and changed some word choices I didn’t like or didn’t fit the story.
> 
> I chose a unisex name for Haru’s mother because Haruka’s name is unisex too (even if it’s used way more for girls and as such ‘’girly, but not unheard of’’). I chose Chiura for Haru’s father because the second character of the name means ‘’seashore’’, and the romanized version also ends with the letter a, even though the characters aren’t the same. 
> 
> I hope you liked it, and constructive criticism is always welcome!


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rin and Haru growing up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own Free!

**Seven**

In his dreams he has a tail. It isn’t scaled, but dark specks scattered over tough matt brown skin. The fins mirror flat shells and there are webs between his fingers. It’s leathery and slimy to the touch. 

He has dreamt of that tail longer than he can remember.

So when he sits up after snoozing in the bay’s shallow part, raising his hand to shield his eyes and sees a long, green tail, his only thought is: _Oh. That’s new._

He follows the tail’s slow, lazy movements in the crystalline water. It swings from side to side and breaks the surface, green scales reflecting sunlight like they’re made of metal. The water flows off it and splashes on Haru’s chest.

He yelps. Cold! It’s hot outside today, unbearable outside the sea or the pool, but the water is still frigid enough to shock him out of his dream like state.

The tail sinks into the water again.

Haru didn’t move.

His breath catches. He isn’t moving those muscles. The tail isn’t attached to him and he isn’t dreaming either. There truly is a face in front of his, way too close for comfort, and dawn red eyes peering up at him. ‘’Hi!’’

Haru startles and accidentally gulps some sea water in. It tastes like salt and gets into his air pipe. He tries to back away, but the cliff is too close by and he hasn’t scrambled backward for more than a meter before he bumps his head against the rocks, still coughing loudly. The impact is hard, and his head pounds for a moment or two.

 _Calm down._ He tries to slow down his heartbeat by controlling his breathing and cards his fingers through his wet hair. There’s a slight bump underneath his fingertips. Wincing, he looks up at the face that surprised him so.

‘’Are you okay?’’ The boy (is it a boy?) asks, furrowing his brow. He leans forward.

Haru doesn’t know what to say. The boy is too close and he doesn’t like it. He squints and leans forward too, hand raised.

The green tail. The translucent fins along the sides are raggedy. It reminds Haru of seaweed. His hand glides along the scales, reveling in the slimy, bumpy texture. A hand closes over his own. There’s webbing between the fingers.

Haru raises his head and catches sight of the boy (yes, definitely a boy. Haru’s certain now) cradling his tail in his arms, sizing him up with wide eyes. Haru doesn’t care.

This is far too intriguing to let go of without even attempting to discover more.

‘’What species are you?’’

Haru knows it’s the kind of question his mother would scold him for, but that’s never stopped him before. Besides, he hasn’t seen her in years. Grandma gets him, though she did say not everyone would see his queries for what they are.

The boy isn’t deterred by the question. On the contrary, it breaks the slight hesitance that crept into his eyes. He tilts his head towards the sun and beams. “My name’s Rin! What’s yours?”

* * *

**Twelve**

“It’s funny, don’tcha think?” Rin is laying on his back, raising his hand above his head, fingers spread to led the sunshine through.

It creates interesting shadows on his face, and Haru should take his pencils with him next time- maybe even his watercolor set. He can’t capture  Rin in black and white- he’s too vibrant and colorful for shades of gray.

“What?” he asks.

Rin’s hand falls and he shifts to his side. “Your eyes are blue, like the water, but mine are red like fire.” He says, putting his cheek on his hand. He gazes softly at Haru, but somehow, neither of them feels the need to smile.

Rin’s tail brushes against his legs, but it seems to be an accident, so Haru doesn’t say anything.

* * *

**Thirteen**

‘’Race me underwater,’’ Rin turns to lay on his stomach, his eyes following Haru. He’s gliding through the water with practiced ease.

‘’No,’’

Rin lifts his upper body and tries to drag himself into the water. He loves how new everything is in the world above, but as much as he likes the beach, getting back into the water is _hard._ Next time, he should stay in the sea.

But that is what he told himself last time too. And the time before that. Plus, Adventures (with a capital A!) are supposed to have obstacles to overcome, right? The human world is definitely an Adventure.

When he reaches the water, he looks at Haru again. ‘’Why not?’’

Haru keeps swimming, but there’s a small pause in his stroke.

‘’Don’t feel like it.’’

‘’Come on, Haru! I know you want to! Swim with me, and I’ll show you a sight you’ve never seen before!’’

Haru stops and stands up, fists balling and clenching his teeth. His glare is intense and Rin has to stop himself from flinching.

This is Haru. He will meet every challenge issued. He doesn’t care Haru is stalking towards him- okay, he does, because he wants Haru to be his friend, but if he is going to be like this, he could go stuff himself with his stupid: I don’t feel like it!

Rin glares back just as intensely and doesn’t give when Haru jabs a finger in his face.

‘’I can’t breathe underwater, jerk!’’

…

Oh.

The fight leaves Rin in an instant and he averts his eyes. Sinking to the ocean bottom doesn’t sound too bad right now…

The sea floor, where Haru can’t follow him.

‘’I didn’t know that.’’

Haru crosses his arms. ‘’Well, now you do. So stop trying to convince me to swim with you!’’

It hurts.

But Rin doesn’t know the meaning of pain yet.

* * *

**Fourteen**

‘’When a siren falls in love and they reach the age of majority, they will feel the call. Then the hunt starts.’’

Haru stares at him.

‘’You don’t get it, do you, Nanase!’’ Rin hisses in Haru’s face. ‘’They find their mate, drag them to the bottom of the ocean and _mark them._ ’’

That, at least, got a raised eyebrow. ‘’And?’’

Rin flushes redder than a fire engine and begins to splutter. ‘’Well… they…’’ A blush creeps down his neck to his chest. Haru’s eyes follow it. What is he thinking?  Rin crosses his arms, shifting uneasily.

 ‘’Stop being such a loser! I’m trying to have a conversation here!’’

Shit. That didn’t even sound convincing in his own head. Haru doesn’t appear to be impressed either. His deadpan expression says it all.

Rin looks away quickly.

‘’Anyway, that’s the reason we’re not supposed to talk to humans. They can’t exactly breathe down there, and if they die… Well, nobody likes a feral siren.’’

* * *

‘’You’ll come back,’’ Haru says crabbily, crossing his arms and looking anywhere but Rin. Rin gets it, though- he knows Haru. He can hear the _please_ and the _promise me_ , even though the human boy doesn’t voice them.

A smile creeps up his face and he surges forward, throwing his arms around his neck. Haru squeaks and Rin giggles. Haru may be an introvert, but he’s not stoic. It’s cute, actually, the siren muses, resting his cheek on Haru’s shoulder.

What’s even cuter, though, is the slight blush on Haru’s face when he pulls back. It does funny things to his stomach.

Rin bites his lip. Should he… His heart sounds like a hummingbird, Haru’s eyes are on him, and his breath catches in his throat.

The water feels strange against his skin, and he shivers, even though he isn’t cold. _I can do this,_ he tells himself, _I can do this._

So he takes a deep breath, snatches Haru’s hand and bites down on the middle finger, his razor sharp teeth coming in handy. Haru jumps, but Rin coils his tail around him to prevent an accident. Blood wells up from the tiny puncture on the raven’s finger and Rin smiles.

Haru, however, clutches his wounded hand to his chest. “That hurt!’’

Rin frowns. ‘’Of course it does. That’s part of the process.’’ At Haru’s glare, he understands. ‘’This is a human quirk again, isn’t it? You call the most ordinary matters strange,’’ he giggles. ‘’It’s a blood promise.’’

Suddenly, he frowns and tilts his head as if he hears a voice in the distance. It’s the last thing he does before his eyes glaze over. He smiles at Haru one last time, disoriented, and swims towards the open ocean.

He blinks, and Rin is gone.

The wind yanks at Haru’s hair and the waves rise, higher and higher, until collides with the cliff, scattering the water and drenching his clothes.

He remembers what Rin once said: _‘’Swim with me and I’ll show you a sight you’ve never seen before!’’_ To his distress, he realizes that parting from Rin is going to strike him even harder. His heart clenches, but he keeps staring at the spot where he saw the last of Rin.

Not for the first time, Haru curses his lungs with all his might- but he damns the true curse resting upon him more. Because deep down in the sea, there is a boy he loves but cannot follow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The blood promise was partially inspired by Rin’s grandmother, who was an ama, a woman that dives for pearls. Somehow, this turned into a courtship ritual in my head, where if a woman gave a man (or another woman), a single pearl as a promise of marriage (or the local merpeople equivalent). As only a woman can be an ama, I wanted a similar ritual for men. So that, and Rin’s shark teeth, let me to the blood promise. These two rituals symbolize something I think marriage is supposed to be: The pearl says: You are my treasure. The blood says: You are my family. 
> 
> I wrote the last scene while listening to ‘’Holding On and Letting Go’’ by Ross Copperman. 
> 
> Also- Did anyone ever think of the name ‘’Mermatsuoka’’? It sounds so funny XD


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own Free!

_“But curses can be broken, right?”_

_His grandmother nods and leans forward. “But our curse can only be defeated when the cursed children leave the sea song behind. Only then they can become one with the sea.’’_

* * *

**Fifteen**

‘’I’m not coming.’’

For a moment, Haru doesn’t know what to say. His lips tighten and he clenches his jaw. His body is shaking, fists balling and relaxing without rhyme or reason. He can’t

 ‘’I knew you were a coward,’’ he spits out, ‘’But congrats, you’ve reached a new high.’’

It’s quiet at the other end of the line for a moment, before: ‘’Young man, I don’t care if you are upset about your grandmother's death, I am your father, and I will not be spoken to in this manner!’’

It takes all the restraint he can drag from his meager reserves not to hurl the phone at the wall. He takes a deep breath and closes his eyes. What had he expected? The fight leaves him, and somehow, that feels terribly sad. He’s tired of the disappointment.

‘’You lost the right to call yourself my father a long time ago,’’ he sighs, ‘’and it has a lot to do with your lack of care.’’

The words he doesn’t say echo louder than the ones he does.

‘’Stop running and come home. I can’t bury her alone.’’

* * *

They carry her body through the darkness, step on the river stones and walk past the seven rapids, to the bay. The sand crunches underneath their bare feet and the air smells like salt. The water is calm tonight, the waves nothing more than bumps gently rolling onto the shore.

The lay her down, her feet in the water.

They hold vigil over her body the entire night. Watching silently as the day breaks and the first sun rays touch the water, their reflection a breath-taking display of orange and red. It seems to take an eternity. But then it happens- the moment the light reaches her body, she dissolves. White flocks are the only thing left behind, and the ocean takes her, riding on top of the waves.

She’s beautiful, even as seafoam. White, airy, and most of all: In her element. She’s joining the sea.

Haru’s chest feels like a cage and he can’t _breathe_ , suffocating, the pressure dragging him down. The realization is awful.

His father tried to break the curse by leaving the sea, but he’s been doing that since Haru was four, and the only thing it resulted in was a child unfamiliar with his parents.

Haru hates the curse as much as he loves sea song, and as he has realized by now, the only way to break it, is to die.

His father disappears again, desperately running from a curse he can’t escape.

(Haru is fifteen, and all his hopes for freedom have turned to dust)

* * *

He has no purpose anymore. It’s easy to lose himself in dreams. The sea song’s jarring notes hurt his ears and the scent of salt escorts him everywhere.

“Take one more step and we’ll be together forever.” It whispers when he sleeps, and the water sloshes around his legs. He can taste his own fear, his heart thrumming in his chest.

The sea waits for no one. It’s a blessing and a cruelty at once.

* * *

**Sixteen**

When he wakes up, there’s a hole in his heart. His fever dreams are full of green tails and sunset eyes. They make him press his hands against his head in an attempt to make it stop. It doesn’t work, it doesn’t work, it _doesn’t_ work and it _hurts._  

He’s never needed someone as much as he does now, so he stumbles out of his back door and _runs._ His sweat-soaked pajamas stick to his frame and he shivers, but he has only one thing on his mind.

The darkness is suffocating, the air is cold and the smell of sickness hangs around him. Nanase river is in sight. The rushing water is a balm to his soul, and when he leaps off the river bank, onto the stepping stones, he can feel his heart beat like a drum.  

The stones cut his bare feet, and the blood soaks into the bay’s sand. His footprints are stained red. In front of the sea, he stops.

His knees give out and he collapses onto the ground. There’s a lump his throat, and he can’t swallow it down.

* * *

Every morning afterward, he wakes up at first daylight, only to find himself on the shore. He’s in the same position as his grandmother's corpse before it turned into seafoam. It screams of death and drowning.

It should scare him, and somewhere deep down, he’s sure it does. It’s just that the sea song sings louder. Louder and louder, until it deafens him. Until he _wants_ so badly it hurts, but he doesn’t know what he desires. It twists and turns, his thoughts whirling around in his head like snowflakes in a blizzard. It’s freezing and unbearably hot both, and Haru shivers along with it.

(salt, ocean, darkness, green scales, sharp teethhatelovewaterwaves, _pressure_ ).

Exhausted, covered in sweat, and sand sticking to his slick skin, he thinks: _A siren song, that’s what this is._

His head falls back, breathing in sync with the roll of the waves. The seagull call sounds and this time, he knows exactly who the sea took. He has resigned himself to his fate- his drowning is only a matter of time.

* * *

**Seventeen**

One morning, Makoto walks into the Nanase household and discovers Haru sitting at the kitchen table, back straight, hands resting at his sides. He’s staring into the distance, towards the sea, and the depth of his gaze is unsettling. His expression is dazed.

For a second, Makoto mistook Haru for grandmother Nanase. He remembers her sitting in that chair, the wrinkles around her eyes creasing like the folds of old knitted blankets, softened by the passage of time. One hand cradling her cheek, the other straying over the polished wood, veins clearly visible. Old, color washed out, withering as people do.

She would sigh quietly, so whole, like it was the last flicker of a candle flame, the smoke the only thing left to spiral in the air.

He blinks and the image is gone. Only the quiet, longing sadness she shared with her grandson remains.

It scares him, to see his friend like this.

* * *

Haru startles awake in the middle of class, the teacher not even bothering to try and wake him anymore. The notes in his ear dance merrily and their message has never been so clear.

Rin is on his way back.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There are a lot vague things happening in this chapter, that will be explained in the companion story (the dream sequence, for example). The companion story I should have been working on while posting this, but, um, KHR said no. It kidnapped my creativity and decided it was going to do fem!Tsuna instead. I’ll probably find my muse for the companion story again, though. It’s far too interesting not too! ^^
> 
> Parts of this chapter were inspired by this quote: ‘’I’ll drown in an ocean of pain and emotion’’ from the song The silent scream by Anna Blue. The song doesn’t really fit this story, but I heard that single sentence and it felt like it belonged so much with this story that I had to mention it. 
> 
> While writing this chapter, I listened to the songs ‘’Cosmic Love’’ and ‘’Rabbit Heart’’ by Florence and the Machine, and several instrumental songs by Peter Gundry. 
> 
> I hope you enjoyed it, and constructive criticism is always welcome!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own Free!

The sea song and Rin’s siren song entwine until they’re one. It’s a wave longing creating a storm of passion. It feels like Haru is carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders walking around these days. The stones for his drowning have already filled his pockets- he can feel the burden pulling on his clothes, even if they aren’t there yet.

To his surprise, their presence is a comfort.

Though Makoto is usually good about giving Haru space, he has been hovering over him the last few days. He keeps reaching out. Almost touching Haru, but not quite. Brows furrowing and trying to keep Haru in sight as long as possible. It’s so subtle Haru wouldn’t even have noticed if he hadn’t know Makoto so well.

It’s like Makoto can sense Haru is going to disappear any second now, so he tries to hold on with a desperation that’s not like him at all. Haru knows he’s the one driving Makoto to this utter madness, but he wants to turn away and simply _not see it_. But it’s never been that easy. Makoto flinches every time Haru withdraws, looking down and burying his hands in his pockets in a terribly awkward manner. It makes Haru’s chest feel tight the way the song holding his ears captive doesn’t anymore.

So he walks with Makoto every day, slowly seduced by the lapping of the waves. He can hear the quiet splashes his first steps into the water will make, but he walks beside the only friend he’s ever had silently. His only friend besides Rin, of course, but Rin is _different._ If that wasn’t clear by now, then nothing would be.

* * *

It all comes to a head on a summer evening. The air is moist, the kind that makes it hard to breathe. It lies over Iwatobi like a heavy blanket, covering the entire town and slowly suffocating it. The sun is bright and most people fled the streets hours ago.

Haru and Makoto are in the Tachibana’s backyard. The wood of the picnic table is rough beneath Haru’s thighs- he’s only wearing his swimsuit. Makoto already gave up on getting him to wear more clothes earlier that day.

The popsicle feels cold against his tongue, a welcome relief from the heat. It’s melting too fast, though. It hasn’t been outside the freezer for more than two minutes and his hands are already sticky from the sugary water running down the sides.

The crinkling sound of plastic being crushed makes him look up. Makoto sits there, his whole body tense, lips tight, his fist is clenched around the wrapper of his popsicle, knuckles white.

‘’Why can’t you just be happy with what you have?!’’

It hangs in the air between them.

A bird tweets in the distance, and Haru can hear the rustling leaves of the camellia shrubs Makoto’s mother cherishes so much. The grass in the yard is dead, but the plant still flowers. The delicate petals of the red-pink blooms remind him of Rin.

Rin is everywhere Haru goes- even if it is only in his own thoughts. It would probably drive him crazy if it was in his nature to struggle against such thing. But it’s not.

Just like his longing for the sea song, his love for Rin has become an everlasting part of his soul.

‘’I can’t change the motion of the ocean.’’ _Fighting against things that are never going to change is futile._

Makoto lowers his head slowly, shoulders hunching and arms pressed against his sides.

‘’I just…’’ his voice is small, his seemingly too-big hands fiddling with the edge of his shirt as he looks down, ‘’wanted this summer to last forever.’’

He raises his head, a sad smile bordering on a bitter grin on his face as green eyes meet blue. ‘’But I guess that’s just not possible, isn’t it?’’

Something in Haru contracts. He raises his hand to somehow comfort Makoto, even though he has no idea how to do that.

He never gets that far, though, because he’s interrupted by the loud creak of the garden gate being thrown open.

Ran flies into the garden, stumbles and keels over, hair falling all around her, her breathing violently fast.

Is she hyperventilating?!

Makoto has already gotten up, ready to deal with a scraped knee, when Ran pushes her hair out of her face like it’s seaweed she’s tangled in, eyes desperate and pleading.

‘’Onii-chan!’’ She tries to get up, but she’s doing everything at the same time and falls down again. Makoto helps her up, but she’s shaking terribly, holding onto his arm. Makoto grimaces. It’s a vice grip

‘’I had a fight with Ren! And… And…’’ she’s sobbing, and it’s preventing her from talking. That only makes her cry harder. Her face is red and her nose is runny. Crying children are never pretty, but Haru’s too concerned to contemplate that now.

‘’He stormed off to Nanase river!’’

Haru doesn’t need to see the blood draining Makoto’s face, because he can feel the same happening to his own. The river doesn’t hurt those who bear the name of the seven rapids, those who bear the curse, but it certainly will take the life of little Ren Tachibana if he gets too close to the riverbank.

The idea of the boy's small body being devoured by the rapids, the light slowly leaving his eyes as he is dragged down by his heavy clothing, to the sharp rocks on the river bottom makes Haru recoil.

Before he’s even got the chance to think, he’s on his feet. God, don’t let them be too late. Let Ren, small Ren, who was just a baby yesterday, still be safe and sound. And most of all, far, far away from the river.

The pounding of his feet is a background noise, and he’s still not running fast enough, but he can’t push his legs to go any quicker. They’re burning already and it feels like fire in his veins, but he _doesn’t care._

He can almost see Nanase river, but Makoto is in front of him, blocking the view and-  A piercing scream leaves Makoto’s mouth.

Haru knows what’s happening before he sees it- Makoto freezing at the sight of Ren slipping down the river bank, white trousers smearing with mud.

Haru throws himself towards the edge, pebbles digging into his skin, but it’s too late. Ren has already hit the water, and Haru’s hand only grasps straws as the current drags the boy with it.

The sound of the rushing water is deafening and it melds together with his heartbeat. It’s louder than anything he’s ever heard before. The cold dirt beneath his body is seeping into his swimming trunks, and his chest is slick with mud. It rises and falls abnormally fast.

The sudden clarity of the moment is stunning in the chaos.  

Haru is content with dying in the arms of the waves, drifting down as bubbles leave his mouth, slowly losing oxygen as he becomes one with the sea.

He belongs to the ocean, but being separated from it until their death is the punishment the Sea God gave to all the Children of the Sea who were tainted with the blood of the selfish fisherman. Haru hates that blood, but his grandmother possessed it too and he did love her. His heart is so painfully human, despite loving a creature of the sea.

Makoto is still petrified, wide eyes staring down at the whitewater's surface. Haru gets to his knees, staring at his hands. There are no webs between the fingers. He looks at his feet. Human. But these feet have stood upon the stepping stones in Nanase river, have passed the seven rapids without a single drop of water wetting them.

He is the only one who has a chance of saving Ren and he’ll be damned if he doesn’t try. One of these days, the water is going to take him anyway. It might as well happen while he’s not throwing his life away in vain.

He stands up, closes his eyes and raises his arms above his head. He inhales, breathing in the heavy air and jumps, using all the power he has in the legs he has cursed for years.

He breaks the surface, the water slamming into him, folding around him and swallowing him whole. Even when submerged, the noise never leaves him. The water beats against his ears, bashes his body and his lungs. It doesn’t want to let him go.

The sea song is there, and so is the siren song. It spirals around him in tighter and tighter circles, light and heavy at the same time. The notes voice so much longing and sing of peace, storms, and chaos. Of places where no line is straight and the light of day cannot reach. Of eternal movement, of red hair and a bright grin, of a mouth against his own and scales hard as steel pressing into his skin.

For the first time in his life, Haru resists. He pushes against the door in his mind until it closes, inch by inch, and locks it thrice. The song pounds into it like a battering ram, demanding entrance. He refuses to listen to it and something in his mind _screams_ : LEAVE ME ALONE! As he puts all his body weight into preventing it from opening again.

Because Ren Tachibana is a child with lungs in need if oxygen, and the sea _can’t have him._

Suddenly, it’s quiet, but Haru doesn’t give it a single thought, because right at that moment, his hand cuts through the water and closes around Ren’s arm. He drags the boy to the riverbank, the water no match for his will when he has something so precious in his arms.

Makoto is finally moving again and pulls Ren up, tugging him against his chest while sitting on the grass. He’s crying, running his hands all over Ren to make sure he’s fine. The boy is crying just as loudly, his face blotchy, and clinging to his brother's arms. His hair is sticking to his skull and his soaked clothes are drenching Makoto too, but neither of them pays it any mind, far too glad to be alive.

Haru has heaved himself up by that time, breathing becoming more even, and all he can think is: Thank god.

It’s quiet. Terribly, terribly quiet. An alien sensation to someone whose world has never been silent before.

Haru stands up and stares at the water. It doesn’t sing. There is no rippling aria attempting to ensnare him, but something surges within him nonetheless. But he doesn’t have to listen to the urge if he doesn’t want to.

It’s a choice now, and Haru knows what to do.

He turns back to Makoto and Ren one more time. His eyes glide over brown hair, soft skin, big hands and a face that holds the gentlest smile he has ever seen. He loves Makoto, he really does, but he has the blood of the fisherman in his veins, and he’s almost as selfish as his ancestor. Almost, because he might be leaving Makoto behind, but he was willing to give up the sea song for Ren. There was no guarantee that he would get it back.  

Ignoring the sea song in order to save the life of another means there’s something more important to him than his own selfish desires.

And that might just be enough.

The corner of his mouth tugs up. 

(“But curses can be broken, right?”

His grandmother nods and leans forward. “But this particular curse can only be defeated when the cursed children leave the sea song behind. Only then they can become one with the sea.’’)

He turns and dives into the water, the river welcoming him in its embrace. This time, it pushes him forward, caresses his skin as he rushes through the seven rapids without hesitating even once. The rocks on the bottom of the river are blurs in his vision as he turns and he twists and feels something _change._

And it rises and rises within him, his heart beating faster and faster, because this is it, this is what he has been waiting for all his life. This is it and _it’s happening._

As it reaches its peak, he bursts into the open ocean, current matching the speed of his body, and he gives _in._

There is calm.

There is quiet.

There is nothing but the sound of the overflow within him. He spreads his arms, bares his neck towards the surface above him, body arched upwards.

He _breathes._

And he is what he was meant to be. A part of the sea, salt water in his body as if it’s air, legs melded into one, his seal-skin in the place that was so painfully empty before.

For the first time in his life, Haruka Nanase is _free_. And he knows exactly what he wants to do with that freedom.

And Rin is there, watching him with eyes as big as saucers, somehow there at the exact moment Haru needs him to be. Rin’s mouth is hanging open, not believing what he is seeing, though he need not gasp for air when he’s underwater and he has the gills just above his ribs to breathe.

The moment is the kind of wild, free thing that does not need words. It speaks, _sings_ its own song.

Haru smirks and propels himself forward with a single movement of his powerful tail, parting the water effortlessly, and grabs the dazed Rin.

He drags Rin down- he is the stone in his pocket, the weight he himself placed there. It’s an instinctual reaction- drown or be drowned, and yet it has another meaning entirely. _Drown in me_ , Rin’s eyes scream, beg, shout- Sunset red sings his heart out.

Haru tightens his hands- webs between his fingers- around Rin’s shoulders in reply, nails digging into his skin. Rin snarls, shark teeth visible even in the darkness of the deeper parts of the sea, and tries to make a grab for Haru instead. He’s unable to break Haru’s hold and keeps struggling, but he’s not unwilling.

It’s a fight, a struggle for dominance and all the words they don’t have the time to utter. But it doesn’t matter, because Rin’s back touches the ocean floor and Haru knows.

They have time now. This is forever.

It’s all he ever wanted and _more._

* * *

Two weeks after Haru’s disappearance, Makoto throws a message in a bottle into the churning waters of Nanase river.

The next day, the mayor declares Haruka Nanase dead.

* * *

The only thing he wrote was: _Be happy_

* * *

In the end, the people of Iwatobi conclude the Nanase boy, Haruka (How peculiar his parents named him; it’s such a girlish name for a young man), must have drowned in the sea, his body washed away by the waves.

They can’t bury the boy, but they don’t want the thought of his watery grave lingering in the darkest hours of the night, so they decide to put a headstone in the graveyard for him anyway.

They try to find a family member to put the boys grave next to, but despite the fact that the Nanase’s have lived here longer than Iwatobi town has existed, they cannot find a single grave that sports the name. “It’s like they turned into sea foam,” they laugh. But the joke falls flat and feels uncomfortably close to the truth.

Makoto grieves, though he knows Haru isn’t dead, for all he was swallowed by the sea. He knows he lost something. He was the land to Haru’s sea, and will have to learn how to live without him.

Haru isn’t dead, but his grave isn’t empty. A part of Makoto is buried there.

* * *

Decades later, the Nanase’s and their curious habits are all but forgotten, only a vague memory in the minds of the elderly. These days, the inhabitants of Iwatobi town talk about the Tachibana’s and their quaint tales of siren songs, love and loss.

They’re good natured, happy folks, though, and nobody minds a fantastical story on a drinking night in that strange little town by the sea. It’s just a story after all, even if the little ones find glistening scales on the shore and the passer-by’s swear they see people swimming in the river whenever the moon is full.

In Iwatobi, there is a river. The rapids aren’t the only thing the children are warned about.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, everyone!
> 
> This is the last chapter! Writing this was a lot of fun! I’m not done, though, because I’m still writing a companion story! I’ll post it once I’m done! This is the current summary:
> 
> Merpeople, unlike humans, know gods in human form. Sirens have patron gods. On their fifteenth birthday, they must journey to the temple of their chosen god or goddess. Rin has dreamed of following his father’s patron god ever since he was a little boy. But there is a reason his father was the shark god’s last follower before he died by sacrificing himself in order to protect his family. The journey is incredibly long and so dangerous that most die before completing half of it. But he must go because he has to see what meant so much to his father that he died for it. 
> 
> She is his goddess, his god, his lady, his lord, she is the darkest depth of the ocean, she is the dream snatcher and wish giver. She is a shark, and he is hers. (He has heard her call for as long as he can remember- but there is another call he must follow, and dream snatcher she might be, but she won’t snatch his. He worships her.)
> 
> He goes back.
> 
>  
> 
> It will also feature Sousuke, Gou and Mikoshiba ^_^
> 
> The selkies in the original story have only two forms, human (out of their skin) and seal (inside their skin). I made the mermaid-like half human, half seal form up because otherwise, the relationship was still going to be pretty hard to keep up with for Rin and Haru. Though I’m sure Haru wouldn’t have minded being a seal if he’d been on his own. 
> 
> The funny thing is that this story originally started with Haru being diagnosed with a chronic illness at a young age. That version would have ended with Makoto asking himself whether Haru had joined Rin in the sea, or if the people of Iwatobi were right with: “The Nanase boy drowned, fooled by his hallucinations.” Perhaps I would even have written a Makoto therapy scene. 
> 
> I wrote this chapter while listening to What the Water Gave Me by Florence and the Machine and Salvatore by Lana del Rey. What the Water Gave Me was also my inspiration for a large part of the story. 
> 
> I hope the story was clear- if it wasn’t, don’t hesitate to tell me! It only helps me become a better writer by knowing the weak points as well the strong points. 
> 
> I hope you enjoyed it, and constructive criticism is always welcome!


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